My dear friend Lauren who is like a sister to me, just had her first baby! And guess which moral-free cad they selected to be her godmother? Me, of course. I’m thrilled! Here is the thing about me and babies. I recognize their cuteness, but they kind of scare me. I mean they just need you so much. You can’t forget them somewhere or casually leave them on some shelf somewhere. You have to attach them to your boob and never let go. Scary!
I recognize that I’m pushing 30 and this whole mentality should probably change. Being around Stacey and seeing what an amazing (and fun!) mother she is to Ollie has really helped. She has made me realize that you can still have a life and have kids and be hot. And now that my friend Lauren has knighted me fairy godmother to her first born, I feel like my fear of leaving a baby on a shelf will diminish even more.
I actually love the idea of being a godmother or an aunt more than being a mother. This is probably due to the fact that you can swish in with a present and a kiss and get a lot of love. And also due to the fact that one of my favorite movies is Auntie Mame and well, Rosalind Russell just made being an aunt the most fabulous thing since the high heel. I can’t wait to take little Mairin to the baby spa for a teeny tiny mani pedi, or to the children’s museum to make a mold of her butt in hot wax or something like that. You know, the good stuff!
Thank you Lauren for trusting me to be Mairin’s godmother. I promise to do my very best!
After a really hectic 12 hour work day spent slinging out copy at the speed of sound and cursing the world for not understanding the word deadline, I came home to an absolutely lovely letter from the child I sponsor through Children’s International. Well actually it was from her mother since she is three, and “too young to write” (my heart kind of melted when I read that).
When I say I sponsor a child, it is actually my very thoughtful ex-boyfriend Zach who gave me the sponsorship as a present, and to my surprise, it is really one of the most meaningful gifts I have ever received. In all honesty, I’ve never really been a kid person. I mean, I like them of course, but I always thought I would be fine with or without kids. And at 29, I still don’t feel that “must have babies” sentiment yet. But as my friends, like Stacey, have started to have babies, I realized that they’re pretty interesting.
Just the other day when I was at Stacey’s, her son Ollie expertly put my JP Tod’s purse on his shoulder, made some very convincing mock calls on my cell phone, and fed me some macaroni with his little paw. What a fun and generous child! I’m beginning to see the intrigue in watching a person grow. It’s fun with my sponsored child Francisca too.
Being that she lives in Chile, I was worried after the recent earthquake, but Children’s International, figuring all us yanks would be in a tizzy, immediately sent me a letter assuring me that Francisca and her family were okay. Feewf! Francisca’s family also writes to tell me about the fun she has chasing around her cat or how she excels in art class, and frankly I’m starting to feel very invested in her future. I’m pretty convinced that I’m sponsoring Chile’s future president. All this for a kid I have never even met. Ah, the power of hand written letters.
This past weekend Craig and I randomly decided we should motorcylce through South America in the near future. He is currently obsessed with buying a motorcycle again, since in Nebraska they start riding them at 11. He used to do wheelies on Grandma Brown’s farm before he could tie his shoes. So maybe I will be able to hop down to Chile some time and meet Franny to thank her for her letters and for being a kid who helped me realize that those little rugrats aren’t so bad after all.
I think Franny may be the next Mary Cassatt. Look at that precise use of color. Seems rather advanced for a four-year-old.
Stacey and I were super psyched to book our third TV appearance for Naked Thanks. The only thing is that we had to be in Richmond, VA at sunrise and had to leave Washington by 5 am. This would have been all well and good if it hadn’t been pouring and the road we had to take had not doubled as a truck depot. Luckily, there was Stacey. When I lost my marbles because I was pretty sure the semis were going to make a pancake out of my Honda hybrid, Stacey calmed me down, assured me we were going to live, and took over the driving until it was light enough outside for me to not lose my marbles.
I-95 was nothing for the Danica Patrick of Erie. Stacey meandered around trucks flying past us at insane speeds like she was taking a relaxing drive down a country road. Needles to say, that Erie weather sure made her tougher than my wimpy Washington DC-raised self.
To top off Stacey’s masterful driving performance, she managed to save us again, even when not at the wheel. She timed our much needed “I’m about to pee down my leg” perfectly. When we got back on the highway, an 18-wheeler had flown off the highway smashing the median. Could we have been next to that truck if Stacey hadn’t decided that our time to run to the Burger King bathroom was there and then? Who knows. All I know is that Stacey should probably sign up for the Indy 500 and she may have psychic powers. Thanks Stace!!
If Stacey and Danica went pedal to the metal against each other, my money would definitely be on Stacey.
Stacey and I really love our blog photos, which the wonderfully talented photographer Joseph Allen took of us. It was actually Joseph’s idea that we be naked, save some perfectly placed props, in our photos. While I know Joseph really well and am totally comfortable reclining naked with an envelope covering my mammary glands, I wasn’t sure if Stacey would be a-okay with baring the birthday suit in front of a stranger.
What was I thinking! It was like we were meant to wear nothing but high heels and stationary. We made sure to close my blinds so my neighbors didn’t think we were having an orgy filled with written communication rather than dirty talk. And I did think about the old joke, “why don’t southern girls have orgies? Too many thank you notes to write.”
But look what our (good clean) fun got us! One of my all time favorite photos. Many naked thanks to Stacey for coming up with, agreeing to, and leaping forward with every zany thing we can think of. Before we came up with the thank you note idea, we were tossing around ideas like 365 days of streaking, so I suppose whatever we come up with for Naked Thanks will be far more tame than our genius streaker blog would have been. There’s always next year!
Elizabeth Hurley in Austin Powers - the image that inspired our photos.
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