One thing about working in journalism is that you receive sooooo many press releases. Some of them are ridiculous, like the almost daily memos I receive from The House of Magnets (dear magnet people, I don’t want to buy a magnetic baseball emblazoned with my face!) or the ones from Todd at Spread the News that are always trying to get me to write about hand sanitizer or a $1.99 pocket purse hook.
Those, I sadly have to delete even though I know some poor copy writer spent a long time putting all that info together. Then, every now and again, I get a press release that makes me very happy. “What a ridiculous piece of knowledge!” I’ll declare. “I would never have known about this world’s largest rubber band ball exhibit/hot celebrity currently on the Hill/Mennonite pie bake off if it hadn’t been for a press release!”
One such press release just cemented my 4th of July plans. I was sitting quietly at my desk when I received one encouraging me to attend the Kutztown Folk Festival. And from that well put together press release I learned that the festival would be a great place to spend my stars and stripes day, after all, it was going to be filled with the Pennsylvania Dutch. And what else you ask? Well here are just a few of the highlights:
“Enjoy the sounds of our strolling Sauerkraut Band”
“Our reenactment of an actual 19th century hanging has stunned audiences for years.”
“A festival tradition is the ox roast where a 1,200 pound ox is roasted on a spit over a bed of coals throughout the day.”
“Hoedowning, By the Miller Family and Sheep Sheering!”
All this a mere three hours away! Sign me up. So that’s what I did. Thanks to a press release, Craig and I will be spending our 4th of July the old fashioned way, with a fake public hanging, parades, Civil War reenactments, bald animals, and a quilting bee. I have a feeling my Independence Day Naked Thanks entry just might be my favorite one yet. Yeehah!
Here are some folks dressed up for the Kutztown Festival. I think Craig and I might have to buy some new digs for our adventure!
Here is the Ox Roast master at the festival! Even though I gave up meat, yet again, I feel like it would be a crime not to partake in this odd feast.
If you work in media, you get press releases. I don’t care if you are an obit writer or a Pulitzer Prize winner, if you are involved with a publication, you’re going to get spammed by places like The House of Magnets (these people send me five emails a week), the united onion lobbyists, and a whole series of others who you don’t want to hear from. But sometimes, in the heap, there is a little gem. My favorite press release of the month came to my inbox on Friday from the Switzerland Tourism Bureau and was titled “Swiss Olympics – Disciplines you have never heard of.”
How could I not open this email? I absolutely love the Olympics and I am always open to new and improved winter sports. The velogemel certainly counts as a sport that should be considered for the next Olympics. In fact perhaps the powers that be should attend the velogemel world championship in Grindelwald , which happen to take place today, and assess if the sport is something the world could get behind. Personally, I see myself excelling at the velogemel. I am best at things where you can just sit there and fly down a mountain with no common sense.
I saw about a half million rugrats on sleds today, but I guarantee you that when I have kids, they will have velogemels. Imagine how incredibly popular they would be on a day like today when two feet of snow blanket our city. If only all Americans had wooden snow bicycles, there would probably have been fewer tears over this snowpalloza hoopla. It’s just frozen water my friends!
Thank goodness there are the Swiss to remind us frightened folks below the Mason Dixon line that blizzards inspire ridiculous sports with names that sound like diseases. Yeah!!
This is the velogemel. I could have really used one today in Washington turned Anchorage.
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