To be perfectly honest, writing this blog has been kind of hard. On most days, I’ve known exactly who I’ve wanted to thank. Inspiration has come in the form of a compliment or a funny experience. Maybe a grown man wearing a denim onesie or a monkey shaped child leash. Possibly a poop joke or a store that sells both candy necklaces and ninja stars. But then other days, I’ve struggled, staring at my computer screen and scanner thinking: “Uh, who should I thank today?”
In reality, the hard thank-you-writing posts are the ones that have probably been the most beneficial to me. I mean, for the last 357 days, I’ve HAD to be thankful for something. But not just the same thing — because that would have been easy. I’m thankful for my family and friends every day. But rather it’s forced me to take stock of all the unconsidered goodness in my life that extends past the obviously wonderful things like my husband, baby, parents, brother, friends, etc., etc., etc.
Mustering up some sort of casual appreciation every day has, in a way, acted as an exercise in positive thinking. Or, since I’m not really a religious person (I say prayers with Ollie every night but that basically consists of us screaming, “AMEN!” at the top of our lungs and “God Blessing” every single person with whom he’s ever come into contact), I could consider this blog to be a pseudo-prayer for me. Like I’m thanking the universe for some sort of daily good fortune.
And over the past year — what good fortune I’ve had! I started back to work after year plus hiatus of being a stay-at-home mom (even just a monthly magazine column feels good to put out), Grey and I got pregnant with our second baby (and we’re ALMOST at the finish line!), Ollie’s grown into a healthy two-year-old-wild-child, and we’ve moved to a charming town we love (zero commute, beach picnics, and where the local grocer knows my name). I have to in some ways think part of all this goodness is due to my thank yous. Maybe I’ve read The Secret one too many times, but I think positive thinking can do some amazing things!
So for the days I’ve sat thinking, at 11:45pm, “Uhhhhhh….who should I write to tonight?” – thank God for random bloggers, People.com, books, magazines, newspapers, Wikipedia, and CNN for thank-you fodder!
Sometimes, inspiration for thank yous comes SO easily. Like this picture I saw today of a family wearing matching Christmas pajamas. This could be a thank you in and of itself -- it's that bizarrely hilarious that it inspires gratitude in me immediately. But other times, writing these letters has been harder and I've had to rack my brain and search everywhere for a note idea.
With only 19 more entries left on this blog, I spent the evening thinking of the things for which I’m REALLY grateful. I figured nineteen…in honor of the countdown:
1. Ollie: This kid is truly the light of my life. Every day I look at him and am amazed I could raise a little being so freaking funny and smart (and undeniably adorable, even if I am his mother and I have to think he’s cute!)
2. My Soon-To-Be-Baby: Luckily Grey and I got prego easily and I’ve had a cakey 9 months of being with child. Fitting this little turkey is going to pop out so close to Thanksgiving.
3. Grey: The thought of marriage used to make me feel like I was being buried alive. It amazes me that I somehow got lucky enough to find a man I adore (and coerce him into marrying me). Plus, after knowing him for nine years, I still find him as hot and sexy as I did when we were drunkenly dancing to Neil Diamond the first night we met. I didn’t even know that was possible.
4. My Parents: Jack and Deb must be the most supportive people on the planet. There’s not many human beings who would continue to love me even if I suddenly turned into a serial killer, but my parents are those people. Plus they’ve put up with my bitchy and ungrateful attitude since day one, so that’s pretty nice.
5. My Little Bro: Despite the fact I used to lock him in the dog cage when he was a small child, we have always been extremely close. He’s the person closest in genetic makeup to me and we share the same exact sense of humor. I’d give him a kidney if he ever needed it and I’m sure if one day he ever gets really really wealthy, he’ll bankroll me. And vice versa.
6. My In-Laws: The fact that I lucked into a family as loving and generous as the Pfarrs makes me wonder if I accidentally sold my second born child to the gypsies. What did I do to deserve such a great other set of parents and sibs?
7. My Erie Girlfriends: Some of my closest, bestest BFFS are from Erie. These are girls I’ve know for more of my life than not and who have seen me through my awkward stages of teenage acne and wearing of high waisted tapered jeans. Again, more people that would love me even if I suddenly turned into Hannibal Lector.
8. My Non-Erie Friends: Despite growing up in the bubble of Erie, PA I managed to make friends like a fully functioning adult and wind up knowing some truly hilarious and gifted people from places other than Western Pennsylvania. Every day I consider myself blessed to know friendly folks that share a common appreciation for filthy jokes involving the word “penis.”
9. My Health: I take for granted that have all my teeth, my limbs, and generally good genes. Thankfully, I’ve never suffered from any scary diseases like elephantiasis or leprosy.
10. Makeup: I often think that if I was born in Puritan times, I would have been a creepy old maid. Without my mask of liquid foundation and eyeliner, I’d most likely have been shipped off to the convent at age ten or forced to marry an elderly man with one testicle so I could raise farm pigs. Scary.
11. My Education: This list is no order — it’s just a coincidence that makeup comes before education…The fact that I can read and write and work a computer and do basic math and sometimes guess the final question on Jeopardy makes me feel extremely privileged.
12. My Status as a Middle Class American: Sure, it’d be nice to actually have one of those 401Ks every keeps talking about, but any financial issues I have are still the stuff of a gal living in a first world country. I don’t have to worry about fetching clean drinking water or how I’m going to keep my baby warm.
13. The Internet: What did people do before they could Google things like, “Best Pumpkin Cheesecake recipe” or “Rehoboth Beach to Annapolis directions?” Talk about a huge convenience. I use it daily and it’s become as much of a modern convenience to me as a flushing toilet. Maybe more so.
14. Modern Technology: In addition to computers, how great is it to have a car to drive places and an oven to cook with? I can’t imagine having to smoke salted pork for the winter or rub to sticks together for fire. Yeah, I think the world’s gotten a bit too complicated for its own good, but, I do appreciate the good things that come with that fact.
15. Razor Blades and Hot Wax: I’m afraid I’d be considered some sort of wolf-boy-woman if not for my trusty Gillette and facial waxing services at the local salon.
16. Good Luck: Somehow luck or Jesus or a Higher Power or magic seems to be with me. I’ve pretty much gotten what I’ve wanted in life (Well, except an invitation to prom from Jamie Peitras, that job at The Gap I wanted so badly, and being shafted at the school play try-outs in 9th grade). All my unreached goals or former dreams seem to have worked out for the best now anyway.
17. My ADD: I think in being unable to focus on certain things has made it easy for me to not concern myself with stressy situations. It’d be nice to finally complete a project, but the fact that I can totally disassociate myself from pressing problems makes life pretty darn carefree.
18. Semi-Stability in the World: As I write this, no asteroids or nuclear bombs are set to destroy the human race…it’s nice being able to count on the sun rising tomorrow morning at 6:31.
19. The Small Stuff: All the little things (and big ones) that I’ve forgotten to mention here because it’s 11:50pm and I’m exhausted!
I also am really grateful for pretty stuff like this sunset... Writing this post felt uncannily like my 11th grade Ethics Class paper, "Testimony to My Uniqueness" (Sorry for the length!)
Speaking of labors and birthdays (ala my last few posts), I can’t believe Karin and I are celebrating our 9 month Naked Thanks Anniversary. AND, what’s even crazier, I can’t believe she’s had to stop publicly writing it. I’m sad, yes, that I will continue on solo with actually publishing these notes (like she said, she’s going to still do it, but privately), but I AM extremely happy for her because she landed a fantastic new gig.
I think it’s ironic that we’ve done the blog for almost nine months now. Naked thanks has come full term and, to be honest, seems to have taken on a life of its own. Writing my daily gratitude notes to everyone from the mailman to my plumber to my husband to the inventor of Q-tips has changed me.
Now in my life I find that I’m constantly thinking of things I am happy about — little bits and pieces of my existence that I find joy in or that bring a smile to my face. Not that I was super negative before; I’ve always appreciated the power of positive thinking, but I truly believe that due to this blog even more good things have happened to me. Even the fact that my second baby’s due date coincides almost perfectly with the year anniversary of the blog. I pretty much know for a fact that one of the best days of my life will serve as the culmination for this whole year-of-thanks goal. That’s uncanny, at least to me.
So, like I said, I am sad Karin can’t continue on this journey with me (at least publicly), but so so so grateful to her for being my partner in Naked Thanks. I am at least happy I can continue to read her posts from the secret back-end realm of the blogosphere…I can tell you that seeing her posts (like the one she uploaded today but didn’t publish) will be incentive for me to keep writing even when I’m sleep deprived or just plain lazy. And, hopefully, the rest of you find me at least mildly entertaining enough to keep reading the site. Fingers crossed…
Ah, pearls and naked note writing...thank, you Karin for founding this site with me!
Ah! Today Ollie turns two! I can’t even believe it. First, geez, does time fly. Where did all the months go? I feel like I was handed a seven pound bundle of blankets and all of a sudden it materialized into a wild little boy that hops on the dining room table and hammers the TV screen with his toy trains. Second, wow, I can’t even believe I’ll have another one of these in just three months. Both thoughts make me want to hysterically laugh and cry and eat massive amounts of synthetic cheese snacks to take my mind off of reality.
Before I had Ollie, I knew parents loved their kids. Everyone knows that. I got the whole “motherhood” thing — or so I thought. Then, August 16, 2008 rolled around and I was floored. I remember one girlfriend telling me to look forward to my labor because it would be the “best day” of my life and, boy, was that dead on. Ollie’s birthday, and every day since then, has been leaps and bounds better than any other time in my life (though I will admit it was fun kisssing drunk boys and dancing to cheesy frat house music in college). But seriously, I think I speak for both Grey and I when I say that having Ollie was the single happiest event in both of our lives. Yeah, our wedding day was special, but bringing a new human being into the world topped it by miles.
When I look back over my blog entries, or even the whole point of why I’m doing this daily thanking — I think Ollie takes the cake for the thing for which I am most grateful. Happy 2, Lil Fella!
My cheering squad checks out a first glimpse of Baby O
Back from the OR, I examine my bundle of joy for the first time...I think it's funny I have essentials like my Blackberry and hairbrush within reaching distance. The necessities of child bearing.
Just a few hours after being removed from my belly, Ollie looks incredibly well-adjusted to life outside the womb. Thankfully, he inherited his dad's rosy skin tone!
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