Karin thanks the woman who made it okay to have sex with your right hand

judy blume

One of the highlights of my short and badly paid journalistic career was interviewing Judy Blume. I did a Q&A with her on what it was like to grow up in a multi-religious household and how she faces her books being banned more frequently than porno sites. Teen sex, birth control, questioning the man upstairs, wet dreams, and especially m.a.s.t.u.r.b.a.t.i.o.n., have led Blume to achieve the rank of second-most censored author in the past 15 years.

Of course when I penned my piece on her, it had the word masturbation in it roughly 100 times. My editor went crazy and decided we had to edit out all the references to fondling one’s genitals to avoid angry letters from our readers. This inspired me to scream like a woman in labor, rush out of the office, and dramatically cry in the rain for a few hours. Censor Judy Blume? You can’t censor someone who is censored. I wanted to tattoo hypocrite across my boss’ forehead, but in the end, she saw the light and I learned one of the best lessons about sticking to your guns when you write.

If you want to pen an article about orgies, vibrators, and people who like to have sex dressed as giant stuffed animals, go for it. You’re always going to make someone cringe. But hopefully you will make a few others feel less freakish because they like to bang dressed as a panda bear.

: Ahhh! Here is the woman that makes the book banners cry! Scary, isn’t she.

Is there a girl who has not read this tome to puberty? My boyfriend Craig admitted it was the hottest thing in his 400 person town's public library, which really is sad. They need to get some good Tart Noir in the Midwest.