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Archive for December, 2009

Stacey thanks director of “Superman” for inspiring a trip to Hoover Dam

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

I remember being obsessed with Superman as a kid. I’d pretend I was the Man of Steel and run screaming through the house, chasing our two toy poodles that I imagined were Lex Luther’s henchman, while reenacting the 1978 film classic. Of all the scenes, my favorite to recreate was when Superman fixes the Hoover Dam. In my version, I’d jump off the couch, yell “HI-YA!” and with one swift karate kick to the air — the Dam would be good as new and civilization could return to normal.

So you could say Richard Donner, the director of Superman, was the inspiration behind yesterday’s day trip from Vegas to the Hoover Dam. If not for him, I probably would have had no interest whatsoever in venturing out past the bright lights of Sin City into the desert. Typically, large scale engineering feats involving incredible amounts of cement hold little to no interest for me — I’d rather just go to the mall. But on the last full day of our trip to Nevada, we decided to take a break from the Strip and we weren’t disappointed.

Grey and I have this game that whenever we're around high places or cliffs, we pretend to push each other over the edge. Right before this shot was taken I jumped out behind him and grabbed his shoulders and yelled, "DON'T FALL IN!" It's our own little sick game, but we find it hilarious.

Here I am at Lake Mead -- the man-made body of water the Dam created. Honestly, I couldn't wait to get back to my laptop and start Googling and Wikipedia-ing this stuff -- Hoover Dam is fascinating!

Pretty exciting stuff, I tell ya!

The best part of the trip? Ollie's souvenir Davey Crockett 'coon skin hat. And the trip to In-N-Out on our way back...

Tags: 80s, cement, engineering, Hoover Dam, Nevada, poodles, Richard Donner, Superman, wonder of the modern world
Posted in Childhood, Famous Folks, Silly Me, Travel | No Comments »

Karin thanks the vacation angels

Thursday, December 31st, 2009

toyota

I’m lying in bed alive and well while Craig watches the Nebraska football game. But! Without Durand Toyota of Bellows Falls, VT we would probably be dead, frozen solid, and half eaten by wolves on the shoulder of Route 91. Maybe archeologists would discover us 50,000 years from now like Lucy the prehistoric woman and declare us miracles of science. Thanks to Dennis and Curtis and the wonderful folks at Durand, we will avoid making headlines in 52,009 AD!

It was a morning that started off like any other. I put on five pairs of pants, four pairs of socks, six shirts, two coats, two pairs of gloves, ear warmers, a neck warmer, a hat, a helmet, goggles, and boots. It was after all THREE degrees in Vermont when we woke up for a day of snowboarding. Then, outfitted like a human snowball, Craig rolled me to the car and we got ready to master the slopes. Now I would have thought nothing much was wrong with Craig’s car, but he declared it a state of emergency, something about “no throttle response.” Sounds sexual to me, but Craig assured me it was vehicle related.

The Nebraskan started to panic, flicking on the hazards and driving on the shoulder of the highway. I was busy doing some limbering stretches for my half pipe mastery so I just wanted him to take the car straight to the slopes and leave it to die near the mountain. But no! The car wouldn’t have it, barely puttering to exit five and rolling into the magically placed Durand Toyota.

Now I would never have guessed that the nicest man angels, mangels if you will, worked at a Toyota dealership in Vermont, but what do I know. When we walked into Durand, they immediately assured us they would fix whatever problem our sad car was ailing from and gave us a brand new Prius to use right away so we could make our snowboarding lesson on time. All this while also greeting regular customers who they knew by name, asking about children and ailments and the like. It was amazing to watch.

If we had broken down in my beloved Washington this is not what would have happened. In DC, frowning employees would have told us that our car had two days to live unless they replaced the entire chassis, the wheels, and repainted it. They would also remind us that the master mechanic was out of town and we had to wait two weeks for anything to be done. Thank god this all happened in Vermont.

All snug in our Prius, Craig and I made it to our snowboarding lesson and happily butt planted all day long while seven-year-olds jumped over our limp bodies. I owe my bruises to Durand Toyota – hurrah! Tomorrow, back to the hills!

Tis I! The queen of falling on the left buttock. It really is attractive to have an arse that is half white and half blue.

Assistant Service Manager Dennis Pearce not only gave us a shiny Prius to drive and make sure we got to our snowboarding lesson on time, but he actually cared that we were stranded in 14 layers of clothing and didn't want to thumb it to the ski resort. No one would be this nice in Washington DC. I love Vermont!

Assistant Service Manager Curtis Green kept me in stitches while Craig babbled words I don't understand like "car" and "problem." While we were there a few other customers came in and Curtis knew them all by name! It was like having a car repaired in Friendly-ville.

Assistant Service Manager Curtis Green kept me in stitches while Craig babbled words I don't understand like "car" and "problem." While we were there a few other customers came in and Curtis knew them all by name! It was like having a car repaired in Friendly-ville.

Tis I! The queen of falling on the left buttock. It really is attractive to have an arse that is half white and half blue.

Tis I! The queen of falling on the left buttock. It really is attractive to have an arse that is half white and half blue.

Tags: butt, saviors, snowboarding, Toyota, vacation, Vermont
Posted in Boyfriend, Exercise, Travel | 4 Comments »

Karin thanks the town that time forgot

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

deerfield

Craig and I were supposed to hit the slopes today and go for halfpipe gold à la Shaun White, but we woke up a little late and insanely hungover. It was also a sunny 14 degrees here in Vermont and we decided to be one with an automobile rather than an emergency room. So what is there to do in subzero temperatures with a pounding “I’m never drinking again” headache? A historic driving tour of course!

As my Belgian mother’s voice echoed in my head with the words (insert escargot-inspired accent here) “eeh why don’t a you go somewhere warm in zee month of le December you dodo,” I convinced the ever agreeable Craig to brave the cold and go marvel at Sylvia Plath’s old stomping grounds in Northampton, MA.

We were all set to witness the tortured genius’ college life when something in my travel bible, “Frommer’s New England’s Best-Loved Driving Tours,” caught my attention: Deerfield, MA home to 14 houses dating from 1720 to 1872! 18,000 objects made or used in America from 1650 to 1900! The words literally made me yelp with excitement. Up there with sex, white wine, and train travel, I just love a historic town! The icons of yesteryear well preserved and ready for my little camera to snap away at, the roped off bedrooms containing dusty objects of intrigue, clothes that required five extra people to put them on you, it’s all just sensational.

Well it turns out that tourism isn’t flourishing in the little town in the middle of winter and absolutely everything in the historic center was closed to our curious little peepers. Luckily, the facades of the houses themselves were enough to inspire a Revolutionary War reenactment from me, and Craig was happy that we weren’t tumbling backwards down a bunny slope with yesterday’s Chablis churning in our stomachs. Thank you Deerfield!

The robin's egg blue Wells-Thorn House from 1747. This was one of my favorite houses in historic Deerfield. Recalls a time when men were men and women were undervalued and pregnant. But heck! It's still beautiful and a great backdrop for a quick jig in the snow.

The robin's egg blue Wells-Thorn House from 1747. This was one of my favorite houses in historic Deerfield. Recalls a time when men were men and women were undervalued and pregnant. But heck! It's still beautiful and a great backdrop for a quick jig in the snow.

Here is what Craig does while I blog - sleep with a gigantic pillow on top of him. I have been making him drive to every picturesque town in New England for the past 48 hours. How fun (for me)!!

Here is what Craig does while I blog - sleep with a gigantic pillow on top of him. I have been making him drive to every picturesque town in New England for the past 48 hours. How fun (for me)!!

Tags: Craig, Deerfield, driving tour, Massachusetts, Revolutionary War
Posted in Boyfriend, Travel | No Comments »

Stacey thanks land of excess for over-the-top trip

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

IMG_8070-1

Ollie has taken to Las Vegas like a fish to water. Here’s a little photo montage to illustrate:

CASH: Ollie helps himself to the contents of Daddy's wallet then proceeds to play, "MAKE IT RAIN!" sans pants for 45 minutes

BOOBS: Ollie ponders a return to breastfeeding

FOOD: Literally "licking the platter clean" at dinner

Tags: boobs, Food, gluttony in every way, land of excess, Las Vegas, Money, Sin City, tourism, women
Posted in Baby blabber, Food, Holiday, Just Plain Wrong, Sex | No Comments »

Stacey thanks maid for cleaning room #12239

Tuesday, December 29th, 2009

IMG_8066-1

So far our Vegas trip is so much fun! However, I pity the Aria hotel maid that got stuck with cleaning our room. I’m sure the poor woman thought she entered the third circle of hell when she walked in and saw the mess we left. Diapers scattered all of the floor, remnants of barf on the sofa, ketchup on the sheets, clothing and makeup scattered over every inch of surface area — it was trashed — even by Vegas standards.

But after leaving our room a complete and utter garbage pit, we came back to find everything looking tidy and clean. You’d think the staff would be pissy — even militant when they had to deal with hotel guests like us, but far from it. There were no notes stuck to the bathroom mirror saying, “Room nasty as hell: bask in your own filth because we refuse to clean it” or “Burn, Pig Pen!” spelled out in discarded tissues. As a matter of fact, the housekeepers are extremely friendly and pretend not to think we’re disgusting dirtbags every time we pass them in the hallway.

If only the maids could come home with me — I swear, I’d feel so much happier on a daily basis if someone would fold my dirty socks and undies into neat little triangles!

Our room after we "unpacked." Looks like an episode of "Hoarders"

If you can imagine, this is how our bathroom at home looks too. I think I may have a problem...

My favorite part of this picture is that there is a phone sitting on top of the bathroom faucet. Hm.

Tags: Aria, filthy pigs, hoarders, inferno of filth, maids, Vegas
Posted in Ew, Just Plain Wrong, Travel | 1 Comment »

Karin thanks the land of cheddar cheese

Tuesday, December 29th, 2009

grafton

It is 12:01 am and I am currently made of cheese. Yes, I think my entire body consists of curds of milk and maybe a cracker or two. Word of warning, don’t come to Grafton, Vermont unless you are prepared to morph into a dairy cow. It’s like being in France or Wisconsin. You just can’t say no to the sharp smooth goodness of Grafton cheddar cheese.

Today, after strolling around the incredibly picturesque town of Grafton, visiting the graves of revolutionary soldiers, and Underground Railroad houses in the nearby town of Chester, Craig and I paid a visit to the Grafton Village Cheese Company where they not only sell you hunks of delectable dairy, but you can also watch them make the salty goodness. They’ve been a direct cause of cellulite since 1892 and are still tempting tourists with their amazing cheddar.

Upon entering the store, Craig and I ate every single one of the 50+ cheese cubes they had as samples along with some gourmet mustard and a bucket sized jar of fig jam. It was getting embarrassing when the staff suggested we break the crackers in half so we would have more to use.

We of course bought a few tons of cheddar cheese from the store, which you think would have satiated us, but no. At dinner tonight, at the Old Tavern at Grafton, we actually ordered the cheese plate like it was some new gourmet find. Tomorrow, thank god, we are going snowboarding and might be able to melt away the 700 pounds we put on this afternoon. 500 downhill runs and lots of butt bruises – here I come!

Hello nothing! Maybe it's growing up in a city but there is something about wide open spaces that I can't get enough of. Vermont is perfect for this intrigue. I get a real kick out of running onto other people's land and snapping some artistic shots like the world is mine.

Hello nothing! Maybe it's growing up in a city but there is something about wide open spaces that I can't get enough of. Vermont is perfect for this intrigue. I get a real kick out of running onto other people's land and snapping some artistic shots like the world is mine.

Grafton, Vermont is a postcard town. It is so damn charming, it looks fake! I kept having to touch the buildings to make sure they were real.

Grafton, Vermont is a postcard town. It is so damn charming, it looks fake! I kept having to touch the buildings to make sure they were real.

Tags: charming, cheese, fat, Grafton, Vermont
Posted in Boyfriend, Food | No Comments »

Karin thanks her magnificent scanning device

Monday, December 28th, 2009

cannon

As I write this from the car, Craig and I just battled three hours of traffic to get around New York City and are in hour nine of our drive to Vermont. Craig, the even-keeled Nebraskan, almost lost his mind in the New York traffic and I coolly took the wheel for about 15 minutes until I went mentally insane and ate an entire bag of chocolate goo balls with lard frosting that his grandmother sent from Nebraska and nearly crashed into a median. But now we are cruising towards the Connecticut/Massachusetts border happy as clams.

There is so much stuff in the car that I suggested we stop at a weigh station or two to avoid paying a fine, but the Nebraskan brushed me off with some ridiculous Midwestern wisdom about sheep and patience.

I think the car is so heavy because I’m toting about 15 pounds of stationary up to New England. I have an entire suitcase packed with my computer, my amazing beloved scanner, pens, envelopes, stamps I stole from the office, past blog entries I have to mail, etc. etc. It’s like the pony express in here.

I have a vision of Vermonters being very benevolent people so I imagine I will have a heck of a lot of thank you notes to write and scan in while in the idyllic state. First I will have to write to the maple syrup people, then the folks who sell me charming sweaters with pictures of cows on them, then the guy who maintains the covered bridge, the chief foliage tracker, the lad that drives the Zamboni, and then of course the doctor who patches Craig and I up after we break all our limbs snowboarding. Vermont is going to give me carpel tunnel with all its charm. Only 111.5 miles to go!

With my precious CanoScan at a gas station in Connecticut. I was surprisingly the only person carrying a scanner while refueling. So un-tech savvy up here.

Tags: Craig, driving, road trip, snowboarding, Vermont, Zamboni
Posted in Boyfriend, Exercise, Travel | 2 Comments »

Stacey thanks in-laws for a great vacation (and overlooking her many flaws)

Monday, December 28th, 2009

Biggie Letter0044

The second leg of our holiday adventure has begun. We got into Las Vegas last night and are readying ourselves for four days full of gluttony (as if we need more) and gambling.

My in-laws, Rick and Louise, are taking us on the trip. I definitely lucked out with my mother and father-in-law. They are very generous people and extremely easy going. For instance, the last time we visited Las Vegas with them, Grey and I went a little too crazy at the Black Jack table and ended up getting separated (I think we came to the mutual decision we were each other’s “unlucky charm”). Sometime in the wee hours of the morning I called my in-laws’ room, crying about being lost “somewhere in the Luxor” without a room key or my spouse. Without complaint my father-in-law stumbled down in his pajamas and retrieved me, the newest and most intoxicated member of his family. Fortunately, they didn’t seem to hold this idiotic behavior against me and even agreed for another round of Vegas fun with us — even bringing my sister and brother-in-law (although this time we’ll undoubtedly be more tame with a one-year-old in tow!).

So long San Diego! Viva Las Vegas!! (The guy who took this picture cut out Ollie in the stroller -- he also told us to smile and say, " Victoria's Secret!" instead of "Cheese" -- so go figure)

So long San Diego! Viva Las Vegas!! (The guy who took this picture cut out Ollie in the stroller -- he also told us to smile and say, " Victoria's Secret!" instead of "Cheese" -- so go figure)

Tags: Christmas, Holiday, inlaws, Las Vegas, vacation
Posted in Alcohol, Family, Holiday, Husband, Travel | No Comments »

Stacey thanks maker of world’s best cheeseburgers

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

Biggie Letter0047

Low and behold, I’m blogging about food again. As if it weren’t enough that I ate enough to make my clothes burst apart at the seams yesterday — oh no, I still keep packing it in. With any luck, I’ll come home weighing upwards of 200 pounds.

Anywho, I thought it was appropriate that I thank In-N-Out — home of the most amazing cheeseburgers known to man — because upon arriving to San Diego, getting a Double Double into my clutches was the first order of business. Good thing I married Grey — I think the only person that loves this fast food legend more than me, is him. As soon as our plane touched down, we both broke out into a hot sweat and were panting like wild animals in anticipation. Once all seven of us were packed like sardines into our rented Kia Sedona mini-van we burned rubber and high tailed it to the nearest In-N-Out as though our lives depended on it. I only regained composure once I had wolfed down a cheeseburger and about three pounds of fries.

As if that’s not bad enough — we’re indoctrinating Ollie into our In-N-Out insanity. On Christmas morning I woke up to find that he had pulled the leftover bag of fries into his crib and was sitting in a diaper and Santa top munching on cold french fries. I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree…

Helping my toddler (who is wearing nothing but diaper and a Santa coat) eat cold French fries in bed on Christmas morning -- while looking like a homeless person. CLASSY.

Helping my toddler (who is wearing nothing but diaper and a Santa coat) eat cold French fries in bed on Christmas morning -- while looking like a homeless person. I am on track to winning mother of the year!!! CLASSY.

Hooray! We're hogs!

Hooray! We're hogs!

Tags: California, Cheeseburger, Five Guys Sucks, glutton, In-N-Out
Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »

Karin thanks her wunderkind friend

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

anna4

The nice thing about being in D.C. over the holidays is that the imposters leave and the city is a ghost town left to the born and bred Washingtonians. Suddenly it’s a small town where everybody knows you and you run into girls you semi-liked in high school and ex-boyfriends around every block. While enjoying Washington transformed into Mayberry, I was able to devour brunch items and hit after Christmas sales today with my friend Anna, who I have known since we were three-year-old tadpoles in baby swim class.

Anna, who hails from a family of blond-headed geniuses, is a mechanical engineer who went to Stanford, stayed on the West Coast and is about to do her third Ironman. Her talent kind of makes me want to vomit sometimes, but she is so damn nice about being a genius/terminator that you have to love her and cheer her on as she makes our gender look really good.

From discovering the wonders of Luke Perry to the joys of sneaking out of our parents’ houses in questionable ensembles and consuming enough vodka to light our small intestines on fire, we went through every cringe-worthy phase arm in arm. We threw up backstage at a Phish concert together, wrote thousands of terrible poems in an experiment involving iambic pentameter and Mad Dog beer, and helped each other figure out how to be adults that might contribute something to this world.

After Stanford, Anna stayed on the West Coast and now lives a life of biking, hiking, running, eating wheat germ and being all glowy and healthy and making us disgruntled sun-deprived East Coasters look like we sleep in a coffin and have the muscle mass of a five-year-old. Still, when she comes home looking like a poster child for good California living, it’s nice to drive around town and point out all the haunts that inspired our adolescent stupidity and sold whiskey to tweens. Washington really is a wonderful place to grow up.

Miserable! This is clear indication that Halloween costumes make children very upset. At least Anna chose a nice girl-friendly costume while I instead really went all out for my future lesbian of America ensemble.

Miserable! This is clear indication that Halloween costumes make children very upset. At least Anna chose a nice girl-friendly costume while I instead really went all out for my future lesbian of America ensemble.

I think we are about 12 here, the height of our shared love for things like Sir Mix-A-Lot, bath products, and casual wear from the Gap.

I think we are about 12 here, the height of our shared love for things like Sir Mix-A-Lot, bath products, and casual wear from the Gap.

Finally, the age of makeup, tweezers, imported clothing, and drunken moments!

Finally, the age of makeup, tweezers, imported clothing, and drunken moments!

Tags: breaking the law, California, ironman, old friends
Posted in Exercise, Friends | 1 Comment »